When I was in high school, I remember reading a story in my Reader’s Digest a story about a woman who died with a closet full of lingerie. The lingerie still had the tags on them. Her husband commented in the story that she was “saving the lingerie for a special occasion.”
I remember lowering the glossy small magazine and thinking, “Huh. That is so sad.”
A few months later my mom died and I was reminded again of this story. I laid in my bed and secretly vowed to never hold onto things with the excuse of “waiting for a special occasion.” What if that occasion never came? I was going to make a conscious effort to embrace the here and now…which would in turn make the day into a special occasion.
Fast forward to today:
When is the last time you wore lingerie?
You don’t really need to answer that question…it’s just a question that came to mind over the weekend when walking into Victoria’s Secret and seeing a plethora* of women shopping for Valentine’s Day lingerie.
As my husband picked out several options (he is not shy in this environment) I started thinking about Valentine’s Day and the tendency our society has to make this ONE day so laser-focused on romance. Shouldn’t romance, sex, lingerie, and love be woven into every day? Don’t get me wrong, I totally get that life is busy. We have jobs, kids, phone calls, life stressors, and gosh darn it…we are exhausted at the end of the day. But shouldn’t it be a priority to look at the one you love and maybe show him or her a little bit of that love each day?
So as you are preparing to celebrate Valentine’s Day (or Celebrate Singles Day…cause that is fun too!) take a moment to consider what you are maybe holding onto in your life that is keeping you from reaching your full potential…as a couple or just as a human being?
Here are a few of my own resolutions that I try to practice:
– Don’t save that nice bottle of wine for a special evening. Who says you can’t have an incredible Chateauneuf du Pape with that delivery pizza? Cozy up with your loved one, grab a deck of cards, turn on some John Mayer (he’s the best for background chill music) and make a Tuesday evening to remember!
– Cut the tag off that lingerie and surprise him on a Monday night. Oh…and PS: wear heels.
– Is there a restaurant you are saving in your mind for a special occasion? Pick up the phone and make a reservation.
– Research shows that happy marriages (or relationships in general) have a positive to negative ratio of 5 to 1. So you should be experiencing 5 positive interactions (a kiss, compliment, pat on the behind, etc) to every negative one. Don’t wait until tomorrow…take the initiative in your relationship and dole out the sugar!
So I do love Valentines Day. Even when I was single I loved it…it’s a day that celebrates the concept of love, so what can you hate about that? I just think that we shouldn’t be shopping for lingerie once a year.
And a message to the 5 men who read my blog:
Shop for flowers and romantic gifts more than once a year! Trust me…it’ll pay off. Hopefully in the form of lingerie 🙂
xo – Marion
* I finally did it! I used the word “plethora” successfully in a post. 🙂